Tag Archives: dad

Why do we view mental illness with negativity?

In the news each day, we see and read about people.  People like Adam Lanza, and others who destroyed the lives of many.  We never hear about the people who have mental illness yet don’t destroy the lives of others.

Why?  Sure the state of mental illness, and the treatment of those with mental illness is abysmal in our country, but not all people with mental illness are bad.

The things that we think and do not say.

In the latter half of the 20th century there was a push to de-institutionalize.  By and large this was mostly a success.  People deserve to live in the community.  Everyone deserves that chance.

However.  Have we gone too far the other way?  I know, some of my readers will rake me over the coals with this question.  But it needs to be asked.

When families have no options for treatment and care of their mentally ill loved ones, what options are there?

We can lodge them in facilities half a day or more away from their home, or we can keep them at home and hope that they don’t destroy the very people that are trying to protect them.

Is less treatment option really the best thing here?

At the time of de-institutionalization, we didn’t have the backyard chemists that we have today manufacturing drugs out of household chemicals and other things that carry large “Hazardous” labels.  If the stuff can kill you without being mixed into other products and smoked, injected or absorbed, then what kind of affect is it having on the minds of the children In utero?

You don’t have to look far for an example.  David is such a child.  He was born addicted to that crap.  And now, while he is largely stable in his current placement, that could change at the drop of a hat.  If we brought him home, there is no reason for him to continue to remain stable.  Right now, it is my belief that he is doing everything that he can to get out of placement.

That can be good, but.  We have seen David do this before.  He worked his program three years ago, came home and tried to kill our family pets.  Sure it was the pets, but… they are part of the family.  What if it had been one of his siblings?  or his mother?  or me?

This post isn’t me saying I want to get rid of my son.  This post is me saying he needs long term help.  Sadly, there are few options available for kids like David.  As he gets older, the options become fewer until he does something so severe that he gets a prison sentence.

Is it wrong of me to want to prevent him from doing something so severe that he gets a prison sentence?

I want nothing more than for David to become a productive member of society.  Given the limited options available for treatment of the mentally ill in this country, I don’t see a lot of hope for that to happen.


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travelling to see David, a sadness.

We live on the great plains of our country.  Northern Great Plains.  we are about 550 miles from the residential facility where David lives. I wish we had train service between here and there.  The nearest depot to his residence is like 5 hours. the last Amtrak went into Billings, MT in 1979.  With the… Continue Reading

Ah David. Good to see the little guy

Would I really travel for 12 hours just to see him for 2 hours?  Yes I would.  Whenever the opportunity arises, you will find me on the road to see David. Had a really good visit.  He was overly concerned about death though.  Wanted to know what would happen to him if his mom and… Continue Reading

A threat of suicide and a prayer

This morning, I received a phone call from staff.  David is in crisis. It is more than that.  Yesterday two young men got into a fight or something, and David decided to get involved.  As a result he lost all privileges.  Has to spend 20 minutes of every half hour with staff. They usually start… Continue Reading

David’s Honesty About Travel

Honesty is often times a misunderstood topic when it comes to David. Is he inherently honest?  Yes, I think so.  I think that most people are.  At least that is what I believe. On the other hand.  Do I believe everything David tells me? No.  I think not, and neither should you. Let me give… Continue Reading

A tragedy in North Carolina

A tragedy in North Carolina.  Police shoot and kill an 18 year old man, identified as 5 foot 3 inches tall and weighing 100 pounds. His mother, Mary Wilsey stated vehemently, “This is not how mental health patients should be treated”. ========= Our son David has mental illness.  He is 83 pounds of lean muscle. … Continue Reading

Frustrating visit. Attitude.

Prior to today’s visit, we had two weekend family visits left at David’s current facility. So we extended the visit by an hour.   Soon, he will be 500 miles away, making it impossible to visit him weekly. The visit started out rocky with David not listening.  But he settled down. Then an hour before the… Continue Reading

Home Security – Securing your home from within

Well, I am researching my book “Securing your home from within”.  I want to make sure that it is as accurate as possible, it won’t go into psychology so much as it will the how and why of particular methods. Given that, there is very little research about this topic.  No how to manuals… So… Continue Reading

Feel Guilty? No!

Attention grabber isn’t it? As a stay at home dad of five kids, or which three have a special need of some kind, I am at the forefront of all activities in our home.  As it should be.  With our youngest son David and his increasing need for near constant attention, the pace is increasing. … Continue Reading

psych team visit today

We met with David’s psych team today. We are doing everything right.  They are surprised that it has taken us this long to seek placement for him. We talked at length about the issue with David spitting up his meds, and were told that it is all about David wanting control.  Has nothing to do… Continue Reading